Venture Industries

[Princess Flamette]

http://venturebros.ning.com/

GO HERE <3

[OriginalDean Venture]

I've never tried... how to put it, "free-form" roleplaying like this (all the forum RPGs I've been in have had a very distinct game element, with a GM, battles, and some sort of quest that needs completion), but this is an interesting idea.

Though I have to admit, since you draw attention to this yourself, your character sounds an awful lot like a Mary-Sue. For starters, she doesn't seem to fit organically within the Venture Brothers universe. Yes, it's full of crazy stuff like vampires, super-science, necromancy etc., but a physical personification of Death seems of another order of magnitude entirely. I like some parts of her backstory, like her coming to the Compound to take away Hank's and Dean's souls, but... she's just too powerful for that fictional universe.

Secondly, if you don't want people to call her a Sue, give her some flaws, other than being "a little nervy". Give her some limitations, too. According to her profile, she seems to be an undead, yet the only effect this seems to have is to make her look pale and gothic. Wouldn't it make her smell like a corpse, dry up in the sun, occasionally need to have her body parts re-attached? Does she need to eat? Does she need to sleep? Does her appearance disgust people enough that she is jealous of normal humans who don't get that reaction? This is the kind of thing people will want to know about undead characters, not "can she look gothic without wearing make-up?".

Thirdly, don't have everyone be crazy about her. According to her description, she instantly makes friends with everyone in the Compound except Rusty, and even he is attracted to her. This seems a bit unlikely. (And I'm not sure even Rusty would be turned on by what is basically a glorified zombie.)

Of course, this is your character, and you do what you want with her. I just feel that giving her some flaws, problems and limitations would make her more interesting. Also, I assume that the enjoyment of roleplaying in your favourite fandom is getting to interact with the characters, not "this is my character and how awesome she is". *You* obviously enjoy playing as Flamette, but readers and other participants will be more interested in the actual cast.

[Princess Flamette]

Say what you must, I know the true